LESSONS I LEARN FROM MY SON...

Wow, It's unbelievable that I have not written in more than two years. I love writing and I am good at it. This means that I have no excuse for not writing and as cliche as I am about to sound, 2020 is my year!!! Here we go:
 Due to certain circumstances, I was only able to start living with my son last year(2019).We always had a beautiful connection and friendship but it's different when we have to live together and hear him call me"mum". I have gotten to learn a lot about him as a child(my child) and as a person - away from a child I would visit during the holidays-. That one has changed me in a few ways that I would like to share.

 Honesty-I have been known to speak in a way that most people consider "filterless". My child is very direct in his conversations.It could be the childish gullibility that all children have but seeing it from my son's perspective, I have began toappreciate the way I speak and began to accept that the way I speak is not a flaw. It's just the way I speak. Its just easier to speak what I am thinking.People can always adjust.

 Patience-Oh Lord! Give me GRACE!!!! This has been my prayer lately. My child is a very sweet boy with a very adult - like thinking mind since he has grown up around adults for the most part of his life. It is very easy to forget that he is just a 7 year old boy trying to be a child.It is during these manifestations of his child side that buttons are really pushed. Patience is not a virtue I have naturally(it is something I nurture everyday). However, living with my boy has been one hell of a patience crash course.

 Listening-Looking at this child of mine now, no one would know that he had speech challenges earlier in his life. He has developed into a very talkative boy with a noticeably vast vocubalry. He speaks really fast and randomly offers bits of information. One has to be very keen when he calls to your attention what he is talking about. He could decide to talk about an incident at school at 9pm when you just want to sleep or about a new animal he has learned about when you are cooking a complicated dish for your husband. I am unable to just hear him because if I want to learn about who he is, I have to LISTEN to him. If I am to create a relationship with him, then I have to LISTEN to him. Respond, don't react. This was the best lesson I have learned. It happened one day as I was doing dishes. He came up to me and said, "Mum, don't shout too much, why do you shout too much?" What followed was a very insightful conversation about how I react to things he does. In his own way, he basically asked me not to resort to the "mwiko" (this is a wooden spoon that I use to spank him as a way of disciplining him). That conversation was such an eye opener. It probably has been the biggest eye opener for me as a mother. I am proud of myself for working on that area of my life. I have to say, responding, as opposed to reaction: saves so much stress and opens the door to more fun and more living.

 Yeah,those are the quick lessons I have picked up from my son. Our son - mother relationship is so special because we need each other to live. I have just met my son, I am learning how to talk to him, how to relate to him, how to demonstrate love to him, how to defend him and basically how to physically be his mother.

I am so blessed to have a son like mine. To be bestowed upon this responsibility of moulding a fragile boy to an independent adult capable of handling life. By God's special grace, this child will be the best version he can be and he will live out his God created purpose.
It's my prayer for all my first-born. My son. My Prince 🤴