FAMILY,FAM-LIE FARMILIAR?

Family is supposed to be a unit where one feels safe. Most of the time it is a unit of association connected by blood.This blood association,in my opinion makes members get away with so much.
Let me pick one that gets to my last nerve after a man beating up a woman.
Female Genital mutilation.I am talking about the intentional mutilation of a woman's clitoris for whatever misguided and outdated reason known to these bad people.

I am going to try and explain in a very simple way what this archaic habit does to women.It completely and utterly destroys her genitalia leaving only a tiny hole to pass urine.Do I need to say that this very natural process ceases to be natural and is a conscious effort after FGM? Some take up to 20 minutes to pass urine,a process that would normally take what? 3 minutes tops?

The pain caused by this inhumane act is very much. There is pain at every stage: during the cut,after the cut,before the cut.They make every bodily function that is supposes to make a woman,woman very painful.
Mensturation is a nigtmare, sex is like a bad bad scary horror movie and the most beautiful task performed by a woman-childbirth- unfathomable.
For those who are at least lucky to get pregnant: some end up sterile due to the many infections that keep recurring after this procedure.
This particular woman was born healthy and fine, with dreams of having her own family,and then because of some ungodly reason,someone decides to take away her clitoris.

Some girls die in the process. That you get,I don't need to go into detail.

FGM is illegal in many parts of the world.Yes,it is performed in countries other than Kenya.
However,this practice is still very much alive.
How? The answer is US.
Us- is the father who looks the other side when the season for circumcission is nigh knowing full well that his daughter is at risk.
Us is the mother who gladly serves tea to the old men who have come into her homestead to discuss the dowry payment of her twelve year old daughter. She knows that this old man will be expecting a child without her womanhood. She has undergone the same,she knows the amount of pain a penile penetration brings,she knows she will never know the joys of a sexual climax yet she sends her daughter to the blade.

Us is the sister who gently tells her younger sister that all will be fine when she knows full well that her sister will have to hold her urine for several days because the urine might hurt her raw wound.She knows that this will cause her problems.
She knows that her sister may die on that mat because her childhood friendMo never did return home after the'ceremony."

Us is the chief who looks the other side when she sees a group of women talking in whispers and heading toward a particular house just because a certain old man sent a tiny,malnourished goat to his house.

Us, is "fam-lie". It is a lie because what kind of safety would rob me of the very thing I was created to be.What kind of association would watch me go through so much pain with a satisfaction of having fulfilled the needs of tradition or whatever else?
Does this sounds familiar?

( This article is not exhaustive on terms of just how bad FGM is.
I would also like to acknowledge that there are girls who have manages to pock themselves up and proceeded to finish school and are leading in the fight against FGM.There are so many,however,who are still losing lives and living miserably because of FGM.
The people against it are shunned by their own communities and women who refuse the cut are even shunned by their own husbands forcing them to undergo this inhumane procedure for the sake of peace and acceptance.
Should you get any opportunity, kindly stand against this procedure.
And if you are a survivor ,a witness,or know anyone who is,kindly get in touch,I would love to share your story.One story at a time,let's get talking and stop this senseless ritual.'
Email; gloriatsu@gmail.com

WHEN YOU GROW UP 21...

Its been a long time since I penned anything.I would like to break my hiatus by talking to 21 year old Gloria.

Hi,and congratulations on completing 1st year of campus. You are alive and well,that's something.

First of all,I would like to remind you that God is the one who has brought you this far.You are required to honour him and serve him.Do you remember when God said that seek ye first the Kingdom of God and all the other things shall be added unto you? Imagine he meant it.So,I appreciate that you go to church on Sunday,but you need to feed on God's word through and through .Therefore, it is good that you get a family of believers so that you can grow.

Do you remember when your mother and all your teachers told you to keep off boys? Yes,they were right. Boys get you pregnant.Of course not by looking at them,it happens when you have sex with them.Gloria,many myths are propagated concerning this subject.I would like to draw your attention to the reproduction topic in Biology in high school; fertilization takes place when the sperm meets the ovum.When this collision grows,it becomes a baby.I would like to tell you that you are not ready for a baby so keep your vagina as far away from boys as possible.

In regard to this reproduction class,I would like to tell you that what you feed your mind is what you reproduce.Feed your mind with helpful literature. If you fill your mind with sex and romance,then the war to keep your vagina to yourself will be harder to win and losing it will be a piece of very moist cake.

Keep friends who help your life; emotionally,spiritually, academically,..you know wholistically.You are in campus for just a short time,you do not need to use that time to fit into peoples thoughts about,well. Everything.

Invest the little money you get.Invest in something, you could put it into a sacco or an investment firm.This is a good culture that will help you in the future.

I wish for you to know just what a great person you are.You are beautiful; and are not defined by the clothes you wear or by what your classmates say. I want you to find strength in who you are.I need for you to find validation within you and not from what is around you.

You need to learn as much as you can.Don't be afraid to ask what you don't know. All your classmates come from different parts of the world and have been brought up in different cultures and background. That you don't know one thing does not mean you don't know everything.You are in school to learn.So,learn.

Take this time to build on things you love.It will not be as easy as you may imagine but hang in there.Don't give up. The little things you achieve are not little, build on them.Keep knocking on doors so that when you are older,they will also be big.


Let me just say again,love may find you and that is great.However, it is not part of the curriculum.

Lastly, read hard and pass. Love yourself  because you are great.Trust God to hold you through. Be careful.And when you do make mistakes,fall forward.

Yours faithfully,
Older you;with love.
Trust me,I have been there.